There are two methods of effectively telling a tall-tale. The first is to hit the listener smack-dab in the eardrums with
the pure, unadulterated, phony facts. This method avails you
the pleasure of watching the fingers of disbelief push his
eyebrows upward and twist his mouth into all sorts of
amusing contortions. However, by using this method you run
the risk of permanently damaging your reputation for
veracity, and thereby losing your audience a little at a time.
With the second method, if the tale is too tall you may
cause it to appear much shorter by using the charming effects
that are always produced by the rhythm of rhyme. This ploy
coddles the listener into not much caring whether or not the
tale is true. He just enjoys it.
Since the following tales are much too tall to be
received with any measure of belief, the latter method of presentation has been selected. You may enjoy yourself
simply, or simply enjoy yourself. In either case, you'll find the tales much shorter than if presented in any other fashion.
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